Busy Bank Holiday

Today Dave and I have finally managed to get some proper downtime. It is much needed as it has felt that we haven’t stopped for the past two days. 

On Saturday we went for a private gender scan. Here in the UK, you are only given 2 scans if you considered a low risk pregnancy (which I am); one around 12 weeks and another at 20 weeks. I am nearly 17 weeks pregnant and from 16 weeks a baby’s gender can be detected on scans. 

We were recommended a place to go for a gender scan by my friend who had her little boy at the end of March. There was an offer on so we actually got a gender scan and a sneek peak 4D scan for £39. 

The staff were lovely at the gender scan. Dave and I did have doubts that the person performing the scan would know what she was doing. But, she let us know that she works at a local hospital we both know. I felt that they explained a lot more about what was on the screen and reassured us that our baby is healthy and doing well. 

Our baby was lying on their tummy at first. I was asked to go and empty my bladder. When I came back in, they had flipped over but their legs were together with their feet up. It was suggested I went for a walk to see if that would get the baby to move into a position that they could determine the gender. This worked and we were told that…

IT’S A GIRL!!! 💗👶🏻💖

I had a feeling we were having a girl. I had a dream about a week or so ago that the baby was a girl. We love our little girl so much already and we have picked a name for her. 

I loved telling our family and friends our news. They were all so happy and excited for us. My Mum has already been knitting cardigans and hats. 

Yesterday we spent the day with our friend and her two girls who are 6 and 4. They adore Dave and he said he feels so much more comfortable that he will have a daughter because we spend so much time with them. 

It is lovely knowing that we are having a girl. It makes it feel so much more real. Plus, I hated having to say it or them. I have been talking to our baby since we knew I was pregnant. I love using her name or saying she or her. 

I have my next midwife appointment in two weeks and my 20 week scan two weeks after that. I can’t wait to see our little girl in a few weeks!!!

Pregnancy and Mental Illness

Pregnancy is such a huge change emotionally and physically. 

Firstly, I couldn’t believe when I did the first pregnancy test that it did say I was pregnant. Dave and I were so lucky; I came off the pill in November and by February I was pregnant. I have read countless stories of couples really struggling for years to conceive. 

The first few weeks I was pregnant I was in a heightened state of anxiety. I was constantly googling every single symptom I had. It was exhausting. I had some abdominal cramps and spotting which made me instantly worry I was having a miscarriage. I phoned my BEP (Bleeding in Early Pregnancy) clinic and they were amazing. I got an appointment the following morning and had a scan. Thankfully, the baby was fine. It was tiny but we saw and heard the heartbeat. It was a huge relief. 
I am so thankful that I am now over 14 weeks pregnant and I am in the second trimester. Physically, the first trimester was tough going at times. I have never been so tired in all my life. Initially, I had nausea and eventually I had full blown morning sickness. Up until recently, I was having awful headaches too. 

Since I have been pregnant, my mood has been good and pretty level. Pregnancy seems to have changed my mindset in some ways. The negative self talk has gone. I am not worrying what people think of me too. Dave and I noticed an improvement in my mood not long after I came off the pill. It has made us talk about different forms of contraception for me to consider for when after the baby is born. We are both wondering if the pill played a part in my poor mental health. 

I don’t have any body hang ups either. Before I became pregnant, I was my own worst enemy. I have embraced the physical changes that have taken place as a result of being pregnant, sore and massive boobs and all! I just think that it is incredible and amazing that my body is currently growing a little human. 

Emotional Day

Yesterday was my lovely Grandad’s funeral. I broke down crying as soon as the cars came to pick us up from my Nan’s house. I then cried all the way to the crematorium and throughout the funeral. The service was lovely. My Dad did an amazing job as a pallbearer and reading a poem. I was so proud of him. During the eulogy, the vicar doing the service mentioned about how excited my Grandad was about becoming a Great Grandad. It was hard to hear that, knowing he will never meet the baby. 

Due to the baby being awkward during our initial 12 week scan last week, we were offered one yesterday evening at 6pm. Part of me felt guilty that we had the scan on the same day as my Grandad’s funeral. The scan went really well. The baby is looking healthy and well. The brain looks good as does the heart. We saw the baby trying to suck its thumb and it looked like it was waving at us! The baby appears to have long legs too. They must take after me! We have a private scan booked for 3 weeks tomorrow to find out the gender of the baby. We can’t wait. The baby is due on 8th November. 

This weekend Dave and I are having a dog filled weekend. We are looking after Walter’s bestie/girlfriend as my friend is on a course. We are going to go to doggy play tomorrow afternoon and on Sunday we are taking them on a dachshund walk. I think a chilled out weekend is just what I need with Dave and these two:

I didn’t sleep well last night even though I was exhausted. I woke up around 3am and struggled to get back to sleep.